Here are the best things you can do to heal your broken heart:
Don’t hold it in:
The first and most important step towards recovery is to LET IT ALL OUT. There’s no way to go around this. Block him on Facebook, delete his pictures, listen to sad songs, watch sad movies, hate on him to your girlfriends and ultimately CRY, YELL, SCREAM – do whatever it takes to let it all out.
It’s absolutely paramount that you DO NOT try to hold it in. Many women stay busy by doing absolutely anything (partying, drinking, finding some new guy) but that will only give you a temporary escape. Unless you take the time to let it you, those feelings will come back with a vengeance.
Focus your mind on something else:
Once you’ve managed to let all or most of it out, it’s time to focus your mind on other things. If you just sit around the house doing nothing, you’ll inevitably think about him all the time. You need to stop your mind from obsessing about this issue and focus it on something else.
Spend time with your friends, exercise, get more involved in your work, do volunteer work, whatever it takes to keep him outside of your head.
The more you sit and think, the worse it will get. The less often you think about him, the better and easier it gets to get over him.
Stop trying to work out why it happened:
Keeping your mind busy with other things is a great way to get over this but it’s not 100% effective. The moment you’ll have some free time, the thought of him will immediately pop back into your head and you’ll start to think about why it happened, how it could have been different and what you could have done to make things work out better.
Look at it this way, can you turn back the time and change anything? No! Then why are you still dwelling on this? It makes no sense and there’s absolutely no point to continue down this path, you’ll just be torturing yourself for no reason
The next time he pops up into your head, chuck him out and replace that thought with something else. It’s not going to be easy but at least you’re doing something to get over him.
Make a list:
Take your time and really think about each item on the list. Consider the implications of each thing and how that impacted your relationship. After you’re done with all of that, make a list of the qualities you’d like to see in your ideal guy. When you’re done with both, compare the two and you’ll realize that your ex is actually not the ‘one’ for you.
Focus on your future successful relationship:
Once you’ve gone through all of the above it’s time to take your most important step. Relax your mind, relax your body, try to reach a calm place in your mind and then focus on visualizing your next relationship. This relationship is very different from the one before it, it’s different because in your mind, it’s perfection. Think of how amazing the next guy will be, think of how great he’ll make you feel, and think of how fulfilling and fun this new relationship will be. Let yourself feel all those amazing, lovely feelings.
It’s important to take this time and visualize the future as it will make it much brighter than the past. Not only that but it will also get you hyped up to take an initiative and make a positive change in your life.
A few more things to remember:
You’re not the only one. When you are in pain and you feel as if it’s consuming you, you tend to think that nobody knows what you’re going through or that nobody has ever felt this way. The truth is that many others before you have been there and have managed to come out triumphant on the other side. This is why it’s important to understand that soon, you will too.
It’s not him that’s upsetting you. Those feelings that you have, are not there because of him, they’re there because of your inherent desire to be loved, a desire that all human beings have. Because you’ve spent so much time with him, you think that he is the only one that can give you that feeling of love.
The need for love and approval creates an overwhelming feeling of lack within, which can seriously delay you from moving on. The key here is to focus on your self-confidence in order to stop yourself from falling into these traps. Only when you feel happy on your own, can you actually feel happy with someone else.